The Chinese Massage OR should I say Chinese Torture

Last nite I went in for my first massage since moving to Vancouver a year ago.
I asked around the office if someone knew a massage place that did them - hard! None of the wimpy massage stuff that you don't even feel... This girl says she knows a place - just tell them you want it hard and they'll give you someone who's strong.
So I call in and make my appointment... only $33 for 1 hour. WOW great... located on Granville Street... called Big Feet. HAHA nice name... ok I'm open to give it a try.

I get there and it's 12 Chinese people all of who 2 can speak English... hmmmmmm
The place is comprised of 20 small rooms with open ceilings so you can hear everything going on.
This was going to be interesting!
I get all undressed and crawl under the thin towel laying on the bed. The room is cold and the sound of many Chinese people yelling at each other over the walls.

We start off by my massage lady - Frey - saying - you tell me if pain. I say - ok.
So off we go.
Well good start... she's got got pressure and good technique... except she kept saying "it okay?"
"pain?" and I kept saying it was good.
THENNNNNNNNN she starting kneading my muscles like bread on my back. I said - PAINNNNN PAINNNNNNN she say - "yes pain"

we got through that.
Then she proceeded to my head. She started by pulling my hair... who'd a thought pulling hair could be good? But it was okay... BUT then she started hitting my head with her hands like they were flippers hitting a ball...

Then she took kleenex and stuck them in my ears. Yes that's correct... Hmm wonder if my ears were that dirty? still not sure what that was about.

Then she kept saying - this maybe pain you... and then I would howl in pain as she tortured me.
Most who know me know that it takes A LOT to make me wince in a massage... well... this was the massage of a life time. No one has ever made me say - not so hard.

It was definitely not a "relaxing" massage - but definitely did the trick on my tight muscles.
So my new addiction is now Chinese Torture :)